Sometime ago I was at a party where my conversation with a rather attractive woman ended easily into a perfunctory hug. To this I attached no personal significance; but it was a special hug variation known around my place as the Glancing Hug of the Implant Capsule.
This holds a particular interest for me since I’m a plastic surgeon who often finds himself in the operating room with usually two silicone implants and with the intent of augmenting the breasts of a consenting woman.
So before coming to grips with the Glancing Hug, a little background music. The human body heals every cut with scar. Not terribly efficient, but it seems to work reasonably well. Everywhere the surgeon goes a scar is sure to follow.
Making a surgical pocket behind the breast, or more rarely behind the Pectoralis Major muscle, in order to receive the implant, involves some cutting. As a result the surface area of pocket becomes lined with scar. In about 7 to 10% of women that scar envelope will shrink wrap itself around the breast implant which is compressed enough to make it firm. This is called the “Capsule”. Actually the implants, themselves, are not usually damaged
WHAT ABOUT SILICONE
All breast implants are made of silicone, even saline implants use a silicone shell. This is a good thing since Silicone is reliably inert, (unreactive against the body’s immune system).
I know, there was a big scare about silicone causing human disease. This has been well studied, and is considered quite safe by most surgeons. There’s a follow-up piece on silicone itself but for another time. But here’s a link to arguably the best work on silicone breast implants; written by Garry Brody MD. He probably knows more about breast implants than almost anyone, and is my go to guy for both lunch and information. http://emedicine.medscape.com/article/1275451-overview/
THE COMMON HUG
So hugs come in a variety of models. They are all spinoffs, of what everyone, in her own way, understands as the Common Hug. For this piece it’s woman on man
Of course there are many and subtle reasons for a woman to be reticent about the physical contact of a hug. These have spawned a variety of hug models; some interesting and some not. By example, there’s the Polite Hug, which is not really a hug at all. Here the woman places both her hands on the arms of the person in front of her, and maintains control of the contact.
There’s the One Arm Hug which is more common with men on men, LGBTQ variations notwithstanding.
And there is, of course, the mother of all hugs: The Hug of Explicit Intent. Don’t even…!
THE DREADED PAT OF DOOM
My favorite, however, is the Dreaded Pat of Doom. At some point during the commission of the Common Hug, and usually towards the end, the man, (among the Straights), will feel her gently matronizing hand, patting his back. The Dreaded Pat of Doom… demolishing any thought of, even an honorable, liason.
THE GLANCING HUG
So here, the Glancing Hug of the Implant Capsule, Is configured to shield the “hugee” from the firm breast the “huggor”, if for no other reason, than because it’s none of his business.
The mechanics of any hug plays out in two phases. The Avoidance Phase and the Contact Phase.
THE AVOIDANCE PHASE
Here, the woman tilts forward at the waist keeping her parturient parts well away from the action. In this way a woman can show or reinforce her intent or lack thereof.
THE CONTACT PHASE
In this part the woman turns her upper body slightly away from him allowing her right shoulder to contact his chest, whilst the right side of his chest, lightly brushes against the outside of her left breast. Head position is discretionary.
This hug is well-known to me.
We meet socially and professionally.
I can certainly improve the rate of implant contracture, and a firm breast; and thereby reducing the incidence of the Glancing Hug. I cannot, however, defeat the dedicated cells of the immune system when they don’t like something.
See, we made it all the way back, and the only casualty was the prospect of my ever being hugged again….not good
Thanks for listening